You know the one, that one where shit is about to pop off but you just don’t know what.

Another round of cluster headaches maybe. It’s funny it’s all so familiar now but familiar doesn’t always mean warm, fuzzy emotions and comfortable. Nah, they crashed in a couple nights ago and so far so good now for about 24 hours. Let’s see how long this lasts…

Thinking a lot about a change of scenery but don’t want to jinx it by running on about the possibility. I am superstitious that way but let’s just say I’m exploring the buh-bye NYC stuff. Been here for a whole lifetime or two and while I am wary of geographics and the romance of it all, this is the first time it’s seemed like not such a horrible idea. I’ve already said too much because… well, I’ve just said too much. This old town is in my veins so it will take a lot, but a lot less than even a couple years ago. Let’s just say doors are opening.

I’m still left this morning with a sense of an impending something, like the boot is about to drop.

Hello Autumn though. Hello, my old friend. Hello.

Hello.

The trees shhhhhhh now when the wind blows. Most of the trees are still green but the leaves are dry and rattle in the breeze. Cooler air came in with rain from the west. Car tires are hissing on the pavement outside. This is my time. Everything green is dying but my circuits start to buzz. Shorter days and longer nights and something in the dark brings me life.

Yes.

That said, I need to be careful today. I’ve got a big go fuck yourself on the tip of my tongue, for no good reason.

Sidenote: I was counseling a friend a couple nights ago on his relationship with his significant other, the blind leading the blind, as it were. We were talking about honesty, as he’d caught her in a rather sizable lie. He wanted to let it go but said it had been nagging at him so I suggested he talk to her about it, but apparently he’d discovered it by being dishonest himself and snooping. I was thinking about it all later and sorted out that I’ve uncovered or discovered lies and/or deception with everyone I’ve ever been intimate with, with the exception of two and they were quite a while ago. Maybe I got lucky with those two? Anyway, I don’t know if it says more about the nature of relationships or the nature of my choices, but it’s kind of sad. I didn’t always confront them, by the way, but given that none of them are around now… whatever.