This year is slipping away quickly and leaving some vague sense of unfinished business, like leaving the house on a trip and wondering if you’ve turned off the stove. You can’t double back and check though when it’s an issue of time. This is a rare sensation for me, even when there’s actually been unfinished business and shit left untended to. I don’t know for sure but I think that’s irony.

Or not. There’s a good chance that something’s been neglected. It’s hard to stay atop of everything… all the adult business that a person gets up to in the course of one’s average day to day life. Damned if I know exactly what it is though, but maybe if I can’t remember then it’s not important or maybe there’s nothing anyway.

Shoes untied.

Words unspoken.

Revenge.

Reparations.

Underwear unchanged.

Teeth unbrushed.

Fly’s down.

Who the fuck knows? Let go or be dragged. This year turned out pretty well, considering, but that doesn’t mean I want to stay here.

There are some souvenirs. Take that word how you want to. Literally or figuratively would both apply. There were a few remarkable triumphs, mostly of a spiritual nature. There are a few scars. I’ll probably never see properly out of my right eye. Not that I ever did but it’s a bit worse than I did on January 1, 2019. There are some aches and pains that may never go away fully. Old guys told me that a long time ago though. You reach an age where shit you messed up as a young man becomes the daily discomfort of later life. That turned out to be true.

Yet what I will remember most is that I got through it all so I can take that as a win. And there is still something lingering, that I really can’t define or put a name on.