Sorry, it’s been a while. The war isn’t over. There wasn’t even a ceasefire. I think I just grew weary of talking about it. One day was running into the next and then night to night. I don’t even remember who was fighting let alone who was winning or losing. It’s just men with large mouths yelling about men with guns and whose guns would win out. Sorry, but it grew tedious. Death didn’t take a holiday but I did, sort of. As it happens I couldn’t take a holiday from myself and that was an issue. Weird dreams settled in. Dreams about losing control of my life. Losing my love. Losing my own narrative. Turns out I need something else to focus on or I get lost up my own ass.

The devil makes work for idle hands, as they say… they say… they… I’m not going to ask who they is. I don’t know who the good guys are anymore. Maybe there are no good guys.

Good or bad is going to depend on whose side you’re on. You can’t be either just because you say you are.