Question: Can you adequately explain why any of your favorite things are your favorite? That is to say, do you know why for example you’ve selected a particular book or film as your favorite amongst all the other books or films you’ve read?

Choose a book, for example. Is it your favorite because it left you with a good feeling? What did it teach you about the world around you? What did it teach you about yourself? Has it shaped your world view or is it your favorite because it fell into agreement with something you already believed to be true, or something you wish to be true? Is it just a nice story about a nice person and it has a happy ending for that person?

We all (most of us) wish for happy endings for ourselves, so that’s a perfectly reasonable answer if that’s why you’ve chose it as your favorite. There’s nothing at all wrong with that.

Do you have any favorite things in your life that you’ve chosen as your favorite because they’ve shocked you awake, or challenged you, or taught you an important lesson? Do you have favorites that aren’t your favorite because they didn’t make you feel good at all? Most importantly, should you be seeking these things out?

I’m not going to answer that last question for anyone else. That I asked it at all sort of indicates my personal opinion on the matter, but it’s none of my business what other people do with their time and energy. I do believe that seeking out knowledge of one’s self through all manners of experience is important, but it’s flatly obnoxious to say that the unexamined life isn’t worth living. That’s a saying that’s always rankled me. Some people are doing just fine without an awful lot of reflection. That wasn’t working for me but it does seem to work for other people, so why judge them?

I am curious though about favorite as an adjective. It indicates judgment so I do like to ask people why when they say something is their favorite. What do you like about it? How does it speak to you? Whether someone prefers one band over another or one pop song over another doesn’t really matter a whit but if it’s something they’ve put thought into it helps me to know that person.

I’m just curious.

Here’s an example for me. If I were asked my favorite rock band I would say Social Distortion. The surface of that is there is a vibe that appeals to me. They’re loud, fast and aggressive without being purposefully offensive. Guitar driven rock appeals to me at a gut level. The power chords charge me up. They also have a certain repertoire of sounds that resonate. The guitars often evoke the sound of car and truck engines starting up, gears shifting, or soaring on the highway. I am, at my very core, a product of the American 60s and 70s, an era of large block engines, the Detroit specials. Giant machines and open highways. The sounds are familiar and comforting to me. They recall wonderful moments of my life.

Social Distorion, as a band, also portray an American persona/mythos and ethos I identify with. It’s working class/lower middle class. They’re hard-driving. They’re hard-working. They’re rebellious. They’re beating the odds and living their best lives. They represent the people that I grew up with.

Mostly though it’s back to the sound. It creates an environment that is a huge part of my experience on this planet. It’s like coming home, in a way. It’s the sense of adventure I felt getting into a car in 1979 and punching the gas. It’s really that simple. It’s familiar. But I’ve thought about it enough to have a ready answer.