Back in Belgrade again this morning. Sunca isn’t quite as forwardly edgy as the s/t release posted up yesterday but it’s no less perfect. This is definitely less experimental and more straight up prog/jazz, and at points has that chill-out club vibe. There is still kind of a far-off in the darkness feel though and there is no need to tell you, that’s what I’m about.
This one seems a lot more “busy” too and that also suits my mood. My brain is busy this morning, but not in any kind of a focused sense. Maybe jumpy is a better way to explain it, a bit of cabin fever having been shut in all day yesterday with my old dawg, who is recovering from being re-sewn after busting open the stitches from her surgery. Were she in any visible discomfort there would be more concern but complaining isn’t her thing. It’s like she’s made of leather, like a pair of sturdy boots. We should all be so rough and tough. I should be…
But I’m tougher than many and maybe most. There is no other choice, and given some thought now, there has rarely been a point where I haven’t been on my own to push through whatever might be going on. I’m actually kind of proud of myself that I’ve managed with some degree of grace to do so. Maybe it’s easier to do it on one’s own? There is less to worry about. You get through or you don’t but with no fear of disappointing anyone. It’s less pressure, by far.
So it was foggy early on this morning and now a rain has settled in. I haven’t bothered checking if and when it will stop today. I don’t really care. The rain is comforting. There’s the hiss of tires on the parkway outside and many fewer people hustling to and fro. Rainy days are quieter. It’s no big deal if it rains. It’s no deal at all. It’s just raining. And this all sounds much more light and cheery than my actual mood, but it’s not like it’s a gray pall hanging over me. It’s just a kind of murky agitation. Not bad. Not good. Just somewhere in between. It will probably be allayed by any action at all. Anything that can be done today that won’t be added to the responsibilities of tomorrow. Anything at all.
For now, more music.