Dateline Ravenna, Italy… 2015. Kimono Lights. Back on the shoegaze/dreampop train for now, I suppose. It’s my prevailing mood the last few days headed into a new year. No need for some things to change. Something a little gauzy and strange before the plan comes into focus, but who am I kidding? There is no real plan to focus on. That’s really the action that’s lacking. Make a plan. Just make a plan. Then think about sticking to it. I can’t remember what my resolution was even though I kind of remember using the word resolution at some point over the last few weeks. It’s ringing a bell. It’s not really like me but it happened.

I think. Or maybe I dreamed it. I dream a lot of things. I think about things and then i dream that i do them and then have to remember if it actually happened.

Silly me.

Whatever. Italy must have a hell of a pop music scene though.

So no, it’s not 2015 in Ravenna, or anywhere in Italy. It’s 2022 in New York City. Brooklyn, to be precise. It’s been a hazy few days to start the year. There was a quiet night in on December 31st and waking up a minute past midnight to the sounds of revelers out on Washington Street in Hoboken. We drew closer in the semi-dark, smiled and kissed and wished each other a happy new year and drifted off again. There was swimming at Coney Island Beach on New Years Day for the Polar Bear Plunge, an odd first for me, and not just because it was actually a balmy 50 degrees and not so polar at all.

More than any other single event though there has been the inhaling and exhaling and trying to get spiritually fit to face the world beyond 2021. It’s been messy out there. It’s been rude. Its been… well… obnoxious. The last few days have been about getting emotionally prepared to return to the day to day and it’s a day to day filled with challenges. We’re coming up on the first anniversary of the January 6th riot at the Capitol. It doesn’t seem as if an entire year has gone by since then. I remember it clearly but what’s odd is remembering mostly that it wasn’t shock that I felt. It was a numbness. It was partly fear and horror, but it was more than partly just a grim acceptance. Like what the fuck did any of you ever really expect? Of course this is happening. Of course it is. What did you expect? And not a fucking thing has changed. It could just as quickly happen again this morning. Nothing has changed except perhaps to get worse. And we still have Covid-19 on top of that. Of course we still have Covid-19

They are really symptoms though. Pandemic virus and pandemic anger.

But most of us are just trying to get by. Through rage and disease the rent still must be paid. The lights have to stay on.

And in an ADHD moment it occurs to me that The Beatles’ Across the Universe may be the first shoegaze/dreampop song.

Insert quiet laugh track here.

I have to start my day.